Balance

Balance is good--something I'm working on having at work and at home. Time for fun and time to get things done and not too much overload on either side.

Work is tough this year--as in, my kids are challenging. Not bad, but I'm still having to figure out what makes some of them tick, how to motivate them to learn, how to help them see that the choices about their life and their friends and education really will affect them for the rest of their lives. For the first time really, I have kids getting suspended for drug possession and gang involvement. And I have kids who are really struggling readers and really struggling learners--and I'm not exactly sure why. I have some kids that have been in America for six or seven years and still are reading on a 1st grader reading level or worse. And I have kids who have gotten themselves in with a bad crowd and are going down a much worse path now than they were last year. And all of it makes me alternate between feeling really motivated to do all I can to help them and really sad for them.
One of my kids was writing a personal essay like entry in her notebook the other day and she started it by saying "Life is hard when you live on Bellaire Boulevard. There are people all around you making bad choices and going down bad ways and they make you want to do it with them. And it's really hard to not go down the bad ways with them, on Bellaire Boulevard." And this is one of my good kids--and what she said is so true. And then I was reading the notebook of one of my kids who gives me the most problems this year--but has definitely gotten better since day one-- and he said "I used to want to be a pilot. I think I would really like flying and I could join the air force or maybe go to work as a pilot somewhere else. But I got jumped into _______ gang this year and I chose to do it and now it seems like trouble. But if I get out they will hurt my family. So I think that I probably won't be able to be pilot. I'm not sure what I'm going to do." I tried to remember his words as he was acting out in class and refusing to do work and prayed for God to give me compassion for him and words that help him, because when words start flying out of his mouth, which they usuallly do, love and compassion are definitley not my first instince. I'm really trying this year to be what they need--meaning when I'm at work, I'm working. The whole time--not wasting time and not on the computer and not doing things for my life outside of school. I'm trying to get back a work-home life balance by really working at work so that I can stay on top of everything and not have to bring work home with me. Though it's hard to leave their stories behind some nights (like tonight).


And I'm so thankful to be able to go to my Monday night Bible study group with these girls every week now--especially after a hard day at work. They are such a blessing to me and I am loving our Bible study right now--we're doing Beth Moore's David. It's a short Bible reading and reading/questions in the book daily and it is SO good. I am learning and realizing so much and it's keeping me reading my Bible, which I had no been so consistent with lately. I didn't realize how much I missed our time together (I couldn't make it during the last 3 months or so because of our play practice and training) until I started going again about a month ago. We've been meeting together for about 3 years now; these girls keep me grounded and draw me closer to God and I am so thankful for that.

We're also finding a balance with working out. It still takes up a chunk of our nights most days, but it's fun. It's something we can do together and the pressure for me, in a lot of ways, is off since the marathon is over. We've still got some races--the San Antonio half-marathon this weekend, the Goofy challenge in January, maybe a triathalon in the Spring. But, nothing is like training for the first marathon--for me at least. And, we're enjoying our new gym membership--and working out in this beautiful weather we're having right now!

And, since we're not spending our whole evenings working out, we're having time for other fun things too, like scrapbooking (this is the first one I've actually ever finished and I really like how it came out!!) which totally consumed my time at home all last week, haha! Once I got in to it I remembered why I never finished any in the past--they're so fun, but take SO much time!

We're also thankful for friends that still want to be our friends after we basically were MIA during September and October. We were able to meet up with some good friends for dinner tonight after our work out since they work right by our house and we'd love to make this a tradition. There's plenty more new restaurants to on our list and they're so much more fun to try out with friends, like tonight!

Life is good. Balance is good. And, as we're still praying about our future and for God to reveal to us where he wants us and what we need to be doing, we're aiming for balance and to stay focused on the important things in life.